Kiamsiap Malaysian Road Trip – Indiana University Bloomington

It all began with this -

Eu Win: Eh! When you wanna go back Michigan ah?

Jian Wei: *lying down on the inflatable mattress; feeling like wanna pang sai* Hopefully on the 21st!

Eu Win: Urghhhhh….Jian Wei, you know that today is the 18th right??

Jian Wei: WHAT???? SHIT! Where got time for road trips?

Eu Win: We leave tomorrow lah!

***

It was 9pm ++ at night, mind you! After some very last minute fb-stalking for friends who are so kind to allow us to gate crash their place for the night, we left Chicago the very next morning at 11am for our male-bonding spontaneous road trip to Indiana University Bloomington, which is an excellent American public university! A part of me was really excited as I would get a chance to meet most of my INTEC mates whom I have not met for more than a year!

We boarded the Megabus on a 3 hour ride to a place called Indianapolis. And speaking of road trips, which more often than not elucidates the aura of spontaneity, our trip to Bloomington was one hell of a road trip. We have no clue on how to get to Bloomington from Indianapolis, except whatever Hafidz told us the night before: take a taxi to the airport and get a shuttle from there. But being the epitome of kiamsap Malaysians, we thought we could cut corners by finding a direct public transportation from Indianapolis to Bloomington without having the need to fork out so much on cabs etc.

Bang balls!

Upon descending from the bus, we asked people ranging from the public, sheriff, Fed-Ex guys to employees in Arby’s. NONE OF THEM KNEW A SINGLE FREAKING WAY!!! What is this man! Heck! We even went to Greyhound for enquires! Our conclusion was: if Greyhound also tarak, we have no choice but to abandon our ‘Religion of Kiamsiapness’ and burn some cash.

At Greyhound Asking for Public Transportation

GREYHOUND PUN TARAK! DIE!!!

So we resorted to taking a cab to the airport for a shuttle straight to Bloomington; the shuttle would easily cost us $25 per person. Though the shuttle fares were fixed, the taxi fare was not….NYEHEHEHEHE! To paraphrase a little: “You can take a Malaysian out of Malaysia, but you cannot take the Kiamsiapness from a Malaysian!” *WTF??* So being a CHINESE MALAYSIAN (racist a little here), we started bargaining with the African taxi driver for the lowest fare to the airport! Poor guy! He tried to rip us off but sorry lah bruddddeeeeer! You where can fight with kiamsiap orang cina wan! We were haggling even as we were driving to the airport! Intense sial!

In the Cab Haggling - Kiamsiap Gila!

That fellow wanted to send us straight to Bloomington for an exorbitant figure, which of course we plainly refused and tried to haggle. When negotiations seem to hit a dead end, my dear Wharton best friend decided to deliver his Wharton-style ultimatum: “It all depends on you sir…whether you actually want to do business.” WAH LAU EH!! Sai ummm sai so keng ah? In the end, no deal. *So much for going to Wharton* =P

Indiana University Bloomington

We were lucky though! Upon arriving at the airport, the shuttle was already there waiting for their next scheduled pick off! Talk about the ‘Goddess of Kiamsiapness’ smiling upon us! It took us about an hour to get there and it was only during the journey we realized why no one knew of a public transportation to Bloomington – Because there were none. @_@ ”EH! Where is this ulu place lah?? Why so many trees wan??” I asked Eu Win. “EH! Why so isolated wan!” he chuckled in return.

Kiamsiap Journey to IUB!

After a hours of kiamsiap journey, we finally arrived at the Indiana Memorial Union! I have to tell you, Bloomington’s campus is just drop dead gorgeous. It’s surrounded by stunning verdant greens and lush gardens that can make any flora lover like me shudder in envy. I couldn’t help but to pose with a “BAGUS” sign to commemorate our crazy and under-planned journey. We basically spent the night at our INTEC mates’ place which felt really homey cause out of the 6, we have 2 sets of couples. So it’s like staying with a….*ahem* FAMILY. HAHAHA!

Two couples, One LDR, Three Singles = Happy Family!

***

The next day we just spent most of our time touring the awesome campus. Since we were on a very tight schedule, the initial plan was to hit the road at 8am in the morning, hoping to milk every second for what it’s worth. But aiyah! Malaysian timing mah! We woke up at 10am. FML! And being EuWin, that buffalo was complaining that his tangki (stomach) is very empty. So we had Bubble Tea for breakfast! It was one of the best bubble tea I have tasted here in America; which made the one in Ann Arbor taste like….shit.

Eu Win even decided to do some promotion for it. =P

Bubble Tea Promotion!

Alas, despite the gastronomical orgasm reaped from such a nice milky taro flavored bubble tea, cold drinks just don’t go well with me in the morning. I had to go “unload” while Eu Win waited outside for me. After the passionate ordeal, I concluded that IUB kids are spoilt brats as they are showered with various options to wipe their asses. You can’t blame me for being a jakun. In Umich we only have toilet papers. But in Indiana, they have toilet papers and also…..

Which should I use to wipe my ass? =P

I decided to use the napkins.I even decided to store some for future use! Damn cheap leh! 10 cents nia! Kiamsiap!! Just JOKING!!! =D I stuck with my conventional toilet paper. And no, I didn’t take the toilet paper home!

On Elizabeth’s recommendation, we even went to visit their preserved animals! It was comical mind you! Take a look at Eu Win’s expression:

OMFG!!! They look like me!!!!

The rest of the day was just filled with happy moments of touring the beautiful campus and catching up with friends. And thanks so much to Elizabeth, CJ, CK, Sandy, Alicia, Wei Lun and Hafidz for being awesom-est hosts! We had a great great time!

After 10 weeks of working in the airport, what more could I ask for?

Last 5 posts by Jian Wei

• One Minute to Midnight - January 1st, 2011
• Prophecy - December 31st, 2010
• Footprints We Leave Behind - November 4th, 2010
• Budapest: Contradictions Aplenty - August 15th, 2010
• Istanbul Day 3: Masters of Our Universe - August 11th, 2010

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