Karangan Budak Darjah 4
Laughs — By Christopher on April 11, 2009 at 12:00 AMIf you are not familiar with the Malay language, please scroll to the bottom for the English translation.
Malay ( original text )
Pagi itu pagi minggu. Cuaca cukup sejuk sehingga mencapai takat suhu beku. Sebab itu saya tidak mandi pagi sebab air kolah jadi air batu dan air paip tidak mahu keluar sebab beku di dalam batang paip. Pagi itu saya bersarapan dengan keluarga di dalam unggun api kerana tidak tahan sejuk. Selepas itu emak saya mengajak saya menemaninya ke pasar. Tetapi saya tidak mahu. Selepas emak menikam perut saya berkali-kali dengan garfu barulah saya bersetuju untuk mengikutnya. Kami berjalan sejauh 120 kilometer kerana pasar itu letaknya 128 kilometer dari rumah. Lagi 8 kilometer nak sampai pasar saya ternampak sebuah lori kontena meluru dengan laju dari arah belakang. Dia melanggar emak saya. Emak saya tercampak ke dalam gaung. Dia menjerit “Adoi!”. Lepas itu emak saya naik semula dan mengejar lori tersebut. Saya pun turut berlari di belakang emak saya kerana takut emak saya melanggar lori itu pula. Pemandu lori itu nampak kami mengejarnya. Dia pun memecut lebih laju iaitu sama dengan kelajuan cahaya. Kami pula terpaksa mengejar dengan lebih laju iaitu sama dengan dua kali ganda kelajuan cahaya. Emak saya dapat menerajang tayar depan lori itu. Lori itu terbabas dan melanggar pembahagi jalan lalu bertembung dengan sebuah feri. Feri itu terbelah dua. Penumpang feri itu yang seramai 100 orang semuanya mati. Pemandu feri itu sangat marah. Dia pun bertukar menjadi Ultraman dan memfire pemandu lori. Pemandu lori menekan butang khas di dalam lori dia..lori itu bertukar menjadi robot Transformer. Mereka bergaduh di udara. Emak saya tidak puas hati. Dia pun terus menyewa sebuah helikopter di Genting Highlands dan terus ke tempat kemalangan. Dia melanggar pemandu feri yang telah bertukar menjadi Ultraman itu. Pemandu feri itu terkejut dan terus bertukar menjadi pemandu feri semula lalu terhempas ke jalanraya. Pemandu feri itu pecah. Pemandu lori sangat takut melihat kejadian itu. Dia meminta maaf dari emak saya. Dia menghulurkan tangan ingin bersalam. Tetapi emak saya masih marah. Dia menyendengkanhelikopternya dan mengerat tangan pemandu lori itu dengan kipashelikopter. Pemandu lori itu menjerit “Adoi..!” dan jatuh ke bumi.Emak saya menghantar helikopter itu ke Genting Highlands. Bila dia balik ke tempat kejadian, dia terus memukul pemandu lori itu dengan beg tangannya sambil memarahi pemandu lori itu di dalam bahasa Inggeris. Pemandu lori itu tidak dapat menjawab sebab emak saya cakap orang putih. Lalu pemandu lori itu mati. Tidak lama kemudian kereta polis pun sampai. Dia membuat lapuran ke ibu pejabatnya tentang kemalangan ngeri itu. Semua anggota polis di pejabat polis itu terperanjat lalu mati. Orang ramai mengerumuni tempat kejadian kerana ingin mengetahui apa yang telah terjadi. Polis yang bertugas cubamenyuraikan orang ramai lalu dia menjerit menggunakan pembesar suara. Orang ramai terperanjat dan semuanya mati. Selepas itu emak saya mengajak saya ke pasar untuk mengelak lebih ramai lagi yang akan mati. Di pasar, emak saya menceritakan kejadian itu kepada penjual daging. Penjual daging dan peniaga-peniaga berhampiran yang mendengar cerita itu semuanya terkejut dan mati. Saya dan emak saya terus berlari balik ke rumah. Kerana terlalu penat sebaik saja sampai di rumah kami pun mati. Itulah kemalangan yang paling ngeri yang pernah saya lihat sebelum saya mati…
English
That day was a weekend morning. The weather was so cold that it hit the freezing point of water. Therefore, I did not bathe in the morning because the water in the tank ( Kolah is a water container made from bricks and is commonly used in bathrooms of older houses ) was frozen and the water in the pipe didn’t flow because it was frozen. That morning, my family and I ate in the fire pit because we could not withstand the cold. After that, my mother asked me to accompany her to the market. I didn’t want to. However, after my mother stabbed her stomach repetitively with a fork, I agreed to accompany her. We walked a distance of 120 kilometres as the market was a 128 kilometres away from home. 8 kilometres from the market, I saw a container lorry coming at high speeds from behind. It hit my mother. My mother was thrown into the ravine. She shouted “Adoi!”. After that, my mother climbed out of the ravine and chased to lorry. I ran after my mother as I was afraid that she would ram the lorry. The driver spotted us chasing after him. Then, he accelerated as fast as the speed of light. We had to chase the lorry with twice the speed of light. My mother kicked the front tyre of the lorry. The lorry overturned and hit the road divider and a ferry. The ferry split into half. All 100 passengers of the ferry died. The ferry man was very angry. He then morphed into Ultraman and fired at the lorry driver. The lorry driver then hit the special button in his lorry. The lorry changed into a Transformer’s robot. They fought in the air. My mother was disgruntled. She immediately rented a helicopter in Genting Highlands and went to the site of the accident. She rammed the ferry man that morphed into Ultraman previously. The ferry man was shocked and reverted back into his human form. The ferry man fell from the sky and crashed into the road. The ferry man broke. The lorry driver was so afraid of what he saw. He apologised to my mother. He extended his hand to shake my mother’s hand. However, my mother was still angry. She tilted her helicopter and sliced off the lorry driver’s hand with the rotors. The lorry driver shouted “Adoi..!” and fell to the earth. My mother then returned the helicopter to Genting Highlands. When she returned to the site of the accident, she kept hitting the lorry driver with her hand bag while scolding him in English. The lorry driver could not answer my mother as she was speaking white man’s language. The lorry driver died. Not long after, a police patrol car came. My mother then made a report at the police headquarters about the incident. All the policemen were shocked and died. The public gathered around because they were curious on what had happened. The police on duty tried to disperse the crowd and he shouted using a haler. The public was shocked and died. After that, my mother asked me to accompany her to the market to avoid more people from dying of shock. At the market, my mother related the story to the butcher. The butcher and the rest of the dealers nearby that heard the story died of shock. My mother and I immediately ran home. Because we were too tired, the moment we reached home, we died. That was the most horrific accident I had ever seen before I died.
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7 Comments
i would like to make that “dumpling-hand-continuously-STABING-the open-mouth” aka ‘The Sapadam’ expression >< read the malay version quite a number of times but the English one is simply………..
Sara, by all means please do =D.
I remembered one of my friend showed me this essay.I wonder if anyone dares to write this in major exams. Looking at the bright side, the examiner will love the essay as it’ll provide a good laugh. =P
J´s last blog post was Flashing
wtf sadist like hell wei the kid!! goodness he just love to see everyone die!!
Kerana terlalu penat sebaik saja sampai di rumah kami pun mati. Semua pun mati lah. lol
SeanC´s last blog post was Vroom… Kerplunk?
J, if you do come across any funny essays, maybe you could pass them to me =D Yeah, the examiner will definitely have a good laugh at that.
Raff, heh.
SeanC, yeah, if you noticed, hearing about the story will shock you to death. So yeah… =D
“Itulah kemalangan yang paling ngeri yang pernah saya lihat sebelum saya mati…”
Awesome!~
Jaqueline´s last blog post was 随笔